HE DOESN’T EVEN LOOK ASHAMED
HE’S JUST LIKE
YEA, THAT’S ME, I DO THAT
There are these little tiny fuzzy bugs that are flying around my pear tree and I kind of want to call them cute but I feel like the second I do someone’s gonna tell me they’re like the spawns of satan and they sting people and kill my trees
Nevermind they’re called “Woolly Aphids” and they’re literal fairies
I feel bad for calling them evil now they’re so frickin cute
that would make the funniest fucking story ever. Due to a mix up at the factory, the template for incantations that was supposed to a publishing company of dark art books is sent to a feminine products factory. Girl then accidentally summons Satan with period blood. Satan gets confused because its “dead blood” and when he shows up he realizes the sacrifice was done incorrectly so he cannot take the girl’s soul but now is bound to do her bidding because oops his bad, he showed up anyway.
I NEEDED THIS SO MUCH IN MY LIFE, I JUST NOW REALIZED THAT
YES. I APPROVE.
You know what book series is not mentioned nearly enough and talks about a very important issue in a brilliantly and cleverly imagined science-fictionistic (is that a word?), futuristic world?
Not to mention the whole damn town gets cursed
he doesn’t just DIE, he’s lynched because the Gaston-equivalent sees them together and the whole town is horribly racist and that’s why she starts killing people
I WILL DEFEND THESE TWO TO THE GRAVE
Life tip: bring a book with you everywhere you go
Life pro tip: bring two, in case you finish the first one.
Bigger life pro tip: Bring a kobo/kindle with you everywhere so you have an entire library with you at all times.
Ultimate life pro tip: live in a library and never ever leave.
Supreme life tip: Become a library
today my nephew (who’s recently decided that he’s a wizard) came round and showed me his book of spells (a folded a4 piece of paper) - i looked at it expecting to see spells to turn people into frogs and to make you fly etc but the only thing he’d written was a spell to make people smile
and i think he must be a wizard because i smiled pretty big
Hemp is a Sensible, Sustainable, Highly-Industrializable Plant
We should utilize it. Hemp could solve many problems.
END PROHIBITION. It is NOT just about smoking.
And you forgot a big one: it is excellent at trapping carbon! Plants pull the carbon dioxide out of the air, turn the carbons into other compounds and release the oxygen, thus cooling the planet.
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